I’ve never been an “ohmygod Mondays” or “living for the weekend!” kind of woman. Until 2017. This year I’ve worked so hard at my job that I’ve re-learned what it is to work hard. I’ve taken on a much bigger workload, a reasonable proportion of which I’ve never done before, and basically figured it out as I’ve gone along, with panache and aplomb, for 133 business days (by “panache and aplomb” I mean “nobody got murdered yet despite very real provocation on several occasions #professional”). It’s fair to say that by the weekend I’m ready for that two day holiday at a deep spiritual level and, conversely, Monday morning feels like the last day of summer holidays Every. Single. Week.
Winter brings an additional level of “WHYYYY” to Monday mornings because work is outside my apartment, where it’s cold. My bed is warm. I know of only one way to motivate my lazy, snuggly butt on a cold and Mondayish kind of morning, and that is: wearing a nonsense outfit and pretending that I am not a Wellington lawyer, I am excellent New York fashion editor type who swans about. (I appreciate that being a fashion editor is stressful AF too, but let me live in a fantasy world. Turns out being a lawyer isn’t all delicious-smelling leather briefcases and sexy Type A man candy, so I’ve already suffered career disappointment once over here).
This particular insanity was born from a moment where I was staring into the depths of my wardrobe on a Sunday afternoon, trying to understand why I still don’t appear to own any winter clothes despite being 34 years of age. I’d just picked up these red bow shoes from Wittner in the sale, after many months of longing looks, and by total coincidence they were on the shoe rack directly below these pants. And my brain went “ping!”. It was just a matter of finding a shirt, and this red and black striped vintage number was pretty much the only option.
Here’s where the blazer is magic. First of all, yes, I’ve worn glittery pants to work before (and these exact ones, in fact) but usually I try to take the look down a notch with gentle colours in complementary tones. Red and teal are contrasting, and this was a feck load of look. Certain things are like a fashion shortcut, and make the viewer think certain thoughts without any effort on the part of the wearer – blazers say “work” or “smart”.
Also useful, because this shirt absolutely does not fit me (and yet is still pulling across the front in the image at the top of the page. Why). It’s a size 16, and I usually wear it tucked in at the front with the sleeves rolled up because I’m casual, you guys, but that was just so much shirt for this outfit. Chucking the blazer over the top hid the oversized fit on the shirt and closed in the shirt, which immediately cut down on the amount of red and black stripe that was on display, making your brain go slightly crazy. It also covers my aforementioned lazy, snuggly butt, which in these trousers, and after 7 months of sitting down for approximately 50 hours a week and only 3 gym outings (TOTAL), is looking like a pancake made by a three year old. Remember this? *weeps*
I have to wear a belt with these trousers, so I tried to at least tone the belt in with the buttons on the blazer. I don’t love it, but sometimes you just gotta hold your pants.
This blazer is a straight up rip off of the Balmain blazer that costs a casual $USD 1,995 on Net A Porter. I mean, the frivolous stuff account will never be at that level – if I had that much spare cash knocking about I’d be going on holiday as soon as humanly possible. While I understand that designer rip offs are a bit shit, this is not a situation where I was ever in the market for a Balmain blazer and then had my head turned by this cheaper option from Forever New. I also ended up buying it in navy, and if we could all go on the Forever New Facebook page and tell them we want it in pale pink for summer, that would be great, thanks guys. (If you’re not keen on Forever New, but you are keen on a double breasted blazer, Camilla and Marc does this one which is a lot more than Forever New but a LOT less than Balmain).
In short: I bribed myself to go to work on Monday morning by wearing sparkly pants and a cheap blazer. Imagine what I could get myself to do if I owned the real Balmain blazer!
Shoes are from Wittner - red no longer available online, but I think the Wellington store will have some left. Other colours still on sale online. Pants are from Asos quite a while ago so now out of stock, but these are a more work-appropriate option. The blazer is available here, and the shirt is vintage (but I really like this very on-trend gingham shirt for wearing with light wash denim or this white Moochi option for something more classic).